The Big Self-Confidence Killer

I’m going to try and keep this post short and sweet and to the point because this is honestly such an important topic that need be said once and then applied to your own life! If you follow me on Instagram (@beyoutifully.healthy) or have kept up with my blogs, you know that confidence is something I struggle with (as many people do) and am constantly fighting to work on. It’s not easy, yet it is so important to love yourself and truly live confidently. And so that’s why today I’m just going to talk over, in my opinion, the number one self-confidence killer: social media. 

Yes, you read that right. The one thing that connects us to family and friends, allows us to post great pictures of our memories, and helps us to discover new people, places, things, etc. is a confidence killer. Here’s why. As I mentioned people post great pictures on here, of who they’re with, where they are, what they’re doing. And how many times have you scrolled through some social media feed and felt jealous, unhappy with your life, upset at being left out, negative thoughts towards you and your body? I’m sure every single one of us has been through that before, and IT SUCKS. It really, truly sucks. One minute you’re feeling great about yourself or an experience you just had when suddenly you lose all that. Why? Because you saw someone else’s post, tweet, comment, picture, etc. that was “better” than you/yours.

This is silly for two reasons, 1) just because they have or did something, doesn’t take anything away from what you have or did and 2) social media is a highlight reel! What I mean by this is that people aren’t going to post about times when they’re feeling sad or lonely, they aren’t going to show their bodies on a bad body day when they feel bloated and sick, they’re aren’t going to write about missing out on opportunities with friends. NO! They’re going to write, post, show their best moments of themselves and their lives–the highlight reel. And while there is nothing wrong with that, there is something majorly wrong with the effects it has when you let someone else’s social post affect and dictate your life, attitude, mood, happiness, etc.

So go ahead and still use social media–it truly is a great connection and community source. But realize that what you see is people’s best and do not let yourself get caught up in the comparison, one-upping cycle feeling. There is plenty of happiness and success to go around so don’t let someone else’s success, happiness, good times ruin or downgrade yours! Realize that you have so much going for you in your life. Be grateful for what you DO have rather than feeling upset for what someone else has that you don’t. Understand that your worth, value, and beauty has nothing to do with the scale, your looks, or what others think. You are truly amazing and beautiful just the way you are (hey I should put that in a song), and once you start living like that you will realize that you have so much going for you and find true happiness.

When you are truly self-confident, nothing and no one can bring you down or affect you. And that is being Beyoutifully Healthy!


Unguarded and Unbothered

If you follow me on Instagram, you’ve probably seen me post pictures using the hashtag “#unguardedandunbothered” a few times, or maybe someone else has used it. **And if you don’t follow me, hit me up (@beyoutifully.healthy) for awesome tips, meals, workouts, etc.** This Unguarded and Unbothered movement was started by Desiree (@desb_) and it has really taken off. I wanted to write a short post on what it means to me and the true power behind this movement.

If you search this hashtag on Instagram, you’ll see lots of pictures that are just natural–no posing, lighting, flexing, turning, essentially no, what society may deem, “perfect pic”. It shows people of all ages, body types, fitness levels, backgrounds, etc. being proud of who they truly are. And not to say that there is anything wrong with posting a good lighting, posed picture o yourself, showing off your muscles and best angles. You have every right to be happy and proud and want to share the results of your hard work–you deserve it!! The problem is that social media, especially Instagram, tends to be highlight reels–only the best pictures at the best times doing the best things are shown. So people start to compare their bodies, lives, relationships, routines, etc. with those that they see in the pictures which often leads to upset, frustrated, bad feelings towards their own lives because it doesn’t look or live up to those that they see. But it is important to remember that it is just a highlight usually, and they don’t walk around looking or living like that all the time!! It’s important to realize that it isn’t all reality.

That’s why I love this movement so much–it’s showing the reality side of life, lifting, muscle gain, fitness, bodies…you name it! People are deciding that along with their posed, flexin’ pictures, they will also post themselves in their natural state–how they are for most of the day. Now this takes a lot of courage to post! I was nervous about joining this movement because in reality when I am eating 2500-2700 calories a day and drinking 12-14 glasses a day, after I wake up, it isn’t always pretty when I deal with full stomach, bloating, and getting slightly fluffy. Heck, I even sometimes wake up bloated from my night snack before bed! But then when I started seeing these posts and realizing that I wasn’t alone in this, I knew I had to hop on and join!

Sometimes I even wonder if it did good because I am still hiding behind my screen when I post, but I realized that this movement began working in my life. When I first took my natural photo in the middle of the afternoon, I realized that I actually liked what I saw. Did I have abs showing? No. Was I bloated? Yes, slightly. Did my muscles perfectly pop out and look lean? No. But I looked strong, I looked healthier than when I was trying to be as super skinny, I looked like me. And that is exactly who I want to embrace and be!! I still struggle with good and bad body image days and with hating certain parts of my body like my nose, my eye bags, or the fact that due to genetics I tend to hold my fat in my lower stomach areas! (I’m sure you can relate to picking apart your body.) But I’m realizing that it’s not about how I look, but about who I am as a person that matters!! It’s my passion I live life with, it’s my dry sense of humor, it’s my crazy weirdness, it’s my heart, it’s my work ethic and discipline, it’s my personality…all these things mean way more in the world than whether or not I have a flat stomach, abs, a butt, or perfectly toned body. And if that isn’t the case with someone, then I’m sorry but you need to ditch them from your lives. Why? Because you deserve more, you are worth more, than someone who just sees your outer appearance!

I encourage you to join in on this too, whether on social media or just in your own life. Be Unguarded: be real and open about who you are truly are; love your body no matter how it looks and be confident enough to rock BOTH who you are and how you look every single day NO MATTER WHAT!! Be Unbothered: be comfortable and confident showing the real you; don’t be concerned with comments and comparisons from others, instead be interested in just showing and being you!!

Be Beyoutifully Healthy because when you live to the fullest, doing what makes you happy, being healthy, and living with confidence in you, your body, and what you’re capable of, without caring what others think, you are undeniably #UnguardedandUnbothered 

6 Reasons You Should Love Your Body

So today I wanted to write a little bit on a serious topic that is close to me and very important: I wanted to share my thoughts on body image. I’ll try to keep it short, but I do have a lot to say on this topic. I have a basic message that I want everyone, everywhere to hear and soak up. I want you to love your body no matter what.

Body image is defined as the subjective picture or mental image of one’s own body. Having a positive body image means that you see yourself accurately and generally feel comfortable in your own skin. Now, of course, there will be times when you’re more bloated, a little less tone, or simply you just don’t like your body. That’s okay, it’s bound to happen. It becomes a problem when instead of a positive body image with a few bad days, you have a complete and total negative body image. Negative body image means that you have a distorted perception of your body, that you constantly and consistently dislike it and see your appearance: your size, shape, features, etc., differently than they actually are. This can lead to things such as depression, isolation, and eating disorders.

In today’s society, body image and insecurity unfortunately have become common. With social media, people can easily compare themselves and their bodies to others and then hate themselves.And it shouldn’t be that way. We should be able to appreciate other people’s bodies and what they have and have worked for, while still loving our own. Trust me when I say I know it is easier said than done, but here are 6 reasons why you should love your body

1. Your body is unique

There is no one out there whose body is exactly like yours–you’re like a snowflake, unique and special. So why would you hate a one-of-a-kind thing? Love your body, flaws and all, because it’s what makes you, well, YOU. Being yourself and loving what you have makes up your life and your personality and you should love everything you have because no one else has it. Treasure your body for that reason.

2. For everything it does for you

When you stop and think about it, your body does a lot for you. It sleeps, wakes you up, keeps your heart beating, let’s you eat and move and do the things you love. It keeps you healthy and allows you to experience whole new things. Often we are so wrapped up in what’s wrong with our bodies that we don’t see what’s right about them: they allow us to live! And they’re the only ones we get (plastic surgery aside), the only places we have to live in for the duration of our lives. By hating it and treating it poorly, you’re affecting your whole life because you aren’t appreciating your body for everything it has, can, and will do for you!

3. No such thing as the perfect body

Sure Hollywood and Social Media have conjured up this “ideal body”, but in reality, there is no such thing as the perfect body. Everyone is different, and “ideal” for one may not be the same for someone else. Some people want skinny, some want muscle, some want both, etc. The point is that it is impossible to please everyone which is why you should stop trying and focus on you. Don’t hate it just because it’s not perfect, because guess what? No body is.

4. Your life won’t be different with a different body

I know so many people think if I can just lose “x” amount of weight, or just tone my muscle up or just get to looking like this that my life will change and be great and all my problems will go away. But, the truth is, your life won’t be different with a different body. Trust me, I’ve been there. And once I got down to the weight I wanted, I still wasn’t happy. I still disliked what I saw…nothing had changed! Don’t wait to love your body until you have reached a certain level or goal. Instead, find a way to love your body–the way it is–at all times. Change your mindset towards your body, and that is what’ll change your life.

5. Life is meant to be enjoyed

Life is meant to be enjoyed…not spent worrying about your body and spending your time and energy hating it! Life is too short to be consumed in something like body image, especially because looks are fleeting and impermanent. Again, I struggle with this so I understand it’s hard, but that’s why I want to help everyone. Life is meant for moments like a celebratory dinner out, staying out late with good friends and maybe skipping your morning workout, treating yourself to ice cream. If you’re consumed with hating your body, you cannot enjoy life. Embrace your body and go out and experience life, living it to the fullest!

6. You are enough

This last one is so, so, so important. You and your body are enough, exactly the way you are! You are beautiful and special, and deserve to treat yourself kindly! Your flaws and imperfections are what you make you unique, beautiful, and perfect! And don’t let anyone tell you differently! Your body is so incredibly amazing and a gift, so don’t go around wasting it and hating on it. So open up, let go of the negative thoughts and just let yourself be…well, enough. If you want more inspiration, check out this video that teaches us why we should love our flaws.

While I mentioned there will be times when you just don’t feel and look your best, it’s important, even in those times, to love your body for everything it is. To love your body, flaws and all. Because at the end of the day, your body is all you have, it’s who you are. And loving it will make the world of difference in seeing yourself as you truly are: Beyoutifully Healthy.

What are your thoughts on body image? I would love to hear them either by commenting below or emailing me!

The Importance of Self-Love

Growing up in this world, we were often taught to put others first, above ourselves, in all situations. This has led to the view that self-love is selfish, taboo, and just not okay. But, that is far from the truth. While yes, it is important to care about others, this does not mean you completely kick yourself, your wants and your needs to the curb in the process. If you cannot and do not love yourself, you can’t love anyone else. You may think you can, but really you are only giving from an empty tank, furthering depleting yourself. Because love sprouts from within ourselves; we cannot shine unto others if we hide our own light.

So, okay, self-love is important, but what is it? It’s going to look different for different people, but ultimately it is all about you putting yourself first, finding what uplifts you and makes you truly happy (not short-term satisfaction, but long-term joy), and then doing it. It also means loving every part of yourself, the good and the bad, and yes, even the ugly. We aren’t perfect and the more we begin to learn to love and live with our imperfections, the better off we can be. Loving yourself entails stopping and preventing any harmful behavior that is so common in today’s world, and instead focusing on accepting yourself, prioritizing your needs, and gaining a true sense of who you are and what you want. Common destructive behaviors can include: harmful self-talk, physical harm, depriving yourself of things you want/need, etc. The first place to start with self-love is to stop these and focus more on yourself–in a positive way.

Self-love can actually lead to a happier, healthier you as well. Greater self acceptance can lead to higher satisfaction in your life and create a true joy and happiness in your life. Self-compassion can help your mental health as well as your ability to reach your goals. When you have compassion on yourself, you can accept your mistakes and understand that they are going to happen. You will realize not to be so hard on yourself, leading you to continuing to reach your goals. As you can see, self-love isn’t only important to your mental and physical being, but your life and achieving true happiness as well. When you make a habit of practicing self-love, you can gain a true sense of yourself. You will learn to push past others and take care of your own needs, and in turn, find the person who you want to be. The person you can become.

Loving yourself can be the first step to becoming a new you and to finding your true happiness. This is such an important element to have in your life, no matter what! While it’s not always easy to look past your flaws, your mistakes, your failures and love yourself through it all, it is so, so worth it. In the end, you are so, so worth it. If you aren’t sure where to start, check out these ways to practice self-love.

How do you practice self-love?